Monday, January 25, 2010

All of my life I have worked in teams with other working towards one goal or another. team of meat cutters on a line, team of auditors auditing a company, team of traders on a desk, adventure racing team.

Now I spend most of my days by alone working on projects around the house. I have david all day and the other kids in the early morning and late afternoon. Life is alot different. I spend alot of time looking at the water or the mountains.

Enoy it while you have it. Now back to sanding drywall

Thursday, January 21, 2010

I took my wife to Lake Quinault lodge for her birthday. It was a surprise as she likes the beach. It was a great place. With a nice great room and fire to read or play games near. It was definitely worth it and I would recommend it to anybody. It was kinda surreal. We were hanging out playing cards watching the other couples in the room. Must of been about 10-12 other couples all doing the same thing, about the same age, etc. As I sat there I thought how odd it would be if there were two guys there as a couple. It would just seem out of place.

As I sat there eating breakfast looking out over the lake I remembered how I once heard that 99% of all people who visit national parks never get a mile from the road. I used to take pleasure in watching those people and knowing that I was going out to cross this or circumnavigate that and get out in the wild country. Now I am one of those 97% looking out wondering what is out there or what it is like or could I doo that.

Friday, January 15, 2010

One project done and one on the way. the first three pictures are the kitchen ready for drywall and cabinets. The last three are Laura's room done except for a little touch up paint.

One project done one on the way to being done.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

A friend gave me this today. Something to always keep in mind.

A happy wife is a happy life!

Sunday, January 10, 2010

I am the luckiest man alive. It doesn't matter what I'm doing or where i'm at, any alternative is not as good as what is presented before me

Thursday, January 07, 2010

Some can not tell you what makes them happy, what they want from life, or how they want to spend the precious few years that they have. They bumble their way through. Unhappy, miserable and not very pleasant to be around.
I want to raise my kids to be good human beings. I am not perfect and I make many mistakes along the way. I want my kids to be happy and successful in whatever they choose to do. I am their protector, educator, their mentor, their advisor and maybe someday their counselor. I am not often their friend. There are oftentimes things that need to be said or done that a friend couldn't or wouldn't do at their ages.
I like to explore. There are so many places that I want to go and see in the wilderness. I want to spend many days paddling or traversing mountains, or riding my bike. I think I was born in the wrong time. I like to watch the sunrise from the top of a high mountain with friends and knowing that at that moment there is nowhere else in the world that I would rather be.
There are many other things that I enjoy, what to learn and do before it it too late. I need to remind myself that every day might be my last. I also need solitude. I can ride my bike for hours by myself with my thoughts. And when I am done, everything else in my life seems so much more important. At the end I so much want that long isolation to be over and retun to my family.
I raced for a number of years. I was drawn to something I love. I found great friends who were as passionate as I about being the best and spending great times in the outdoors. We helped each other through tough times and saw some beautiful sights. We pushed each other and ourselves to be better than we could individually.
I am taking a step back from that for a while. Many other things in my life have been put on hold because of my drive and determination. For the foreseable future I will be staying home working on projects and plans that have been put on the back burner. Hopefully those things can be done soon or when all the kids are gone in 10-12years I will set outfor the ultimate adventure.
Right now I am cleaning, remodelling, selling stuff that I haven't used in many years. Trying to simplify. The kids are up and off by 9. I spend a few hours doing carpentry and spend the rest of the day doing other chores that keep a house with 2 adults and 5 kids humming along. Always ending with sweeping the floor at the end of the day. I made a list and it is huge, I am not sure how long it will take. I am very close to finishing the remodel of Laura's bedroom. Then I will finish the kitchen remodel.
I feel like a caged animal but I know that in due time I will be out again